Ending one’s own life is never an easy decision- and neither a one that’s taken ‘rashly’ or ‘heat in the moment’!
One has to have every single shred of hope from one’s soul, in order to snuff out one’s breath!
|Whose fault is it??
Survival is the most basic human instinct- one that kicks in, almost, every single time, no matter how weakened the body and mind are! The will of a person to live is usually one of the brightest flames that burn, and for the most of us, it never goes out- even in our last breath.. Even in our last moments, most of us have that instinct that wants us to live on for another day- no matter how fulfilling, or shitty, the life has been so far.
And if somebody decides- in a cold, calculated manner- to give up on life; if someone had planned, and executed, ending their own lives, it means that THAT very instinct had died.. It means that they could see nothing else that life had to offer, that they would be interested in!
I’m no expert of either psychology or life, but I do know this much- suicide is NOT an act of cowardice, or having “lost one’s marbles”!
It’s the closure one seeks, when every single door of hope has been shut down, when all have abandoned you, to writhe in your agony, to suffer and bear your pain alone- even though they (at least they pretend and claim so) haven’t realized it.
The one who commits suicide is rarely the one to be blamed at- it’s SOMEONE from around them!
It could be the parents- who never taught to fight on, to live on, to hope- and/or failed to create a pillow for them to fall back upon!
It could be the supposed ‘significant other’ who, in today’s world, is there just to exploit you- and do the lip-service of “sorry! It’s not you, it’s me”, and ‘move on’ (read ‘run away from owing up to, and suffering the punishment for, their sins, leaving you to pay for them’)!
It could be the fake friends- who don’t think twice about the consequences of their betrayal on you!
It could be the society, with its stereotypes and cut-and-dried, bigoted rules (viz. “If a girl breaks up, it’s her life and she should have the liberty of placing her happiness first. But if a boy does, he’s a man-slut, who never deserves another girl”, “Women are the one who deserve the benefit of doubt”).
It could be the religion- which forces down the dogma of ‘just and loving’ God down your throat, thus forcing you to seek reasons to be happy in the most unimaginable horrors; which laughs you off if you suggest that perhaps the reason for so much suffering in the world could be that the God is indeed a sadist, who can’t see people happy, and that’s why he created negativity!
It could be over-liberal, over-forgiving, and victimizer-biased philosophy and spirituality, which refuses to acknowledge that normal hums don’t give a damn about which life’s Karma are we paying for, or what ‘lessons’ are there to learn; which turns a deaf ear to the writhing cries of vengeance emitting from the agonized hearts, which is too busy trying to humanize and defend the perpetrators of hurt, to see the crimson tears of the ones hurt!
Another interesting pattern is that it’s always (or nearly so) the idealist and moral, selfless and gentle people who commit suicide! I’m yet to see a “me-first”, ‘practical’ (read nearly moral-less), badass person take their lives.. Is it because they value their own skins and comfort over everything else? Maybe they always find a reason to go on, because they can find something in there for them, in everything! Or maybe nothing, for them, is more important than themselves, nothing worth dying for.. Maybe they’re never that much attached to anything that it becomes more important to them than themselves!
Idealists, on the other hand, have a little (often bordering on none) regard for themselves, their well-being, their happiness or comfort! There’s always something- or someone- else, which/ who represents a higher calling to them. Generally, idealists believe in giving their 100% to everything they do, to people they’re with- and thus, by the virtue of the human nature, end up expecting the output to be at par, especially if they were not the ones doing anything wrong! They never compromise on the part of their input, so naturally their worlds would come crushing down if they’re told to suffer for no fault on their part..
Since they haven’t compromised on their efforts, so we have the hardest workers, most sincere employees, and “nice guy” boyfriends who are mostly found with a self-fashioned noose around their necks, with slashed wrists or with white froth bubbling out of their lips! In contrast, the ‘practical’ people are always the morally uncommitted, dishonest ones. They are never bummed out for long because they know that they have something stashed away in their larders, which they hadn’t devoted, which they can fall back upon and rebuild from!
So whose fault, in reality, is it- the suicide?? The person, who was stupid enough to take the religion and moral education seriously, to believe that if you do give your 100% with entire heart-and-soul, uphold the rules of goodness and be the one to bring happiness to others; you’ll remain untouched by pain, hurt, rejection, betrayal and dejection?? Or of the society’s- ours- that we encourage people to live with these untrue, hollow notions, so that we ‘practical’, ‘moving on’ people could live-off them, reveling while they suffer on our behalf??
A suicide is not the failure of a person- it’s the failure of a whole society, the nation, the system and civilization that we are living in! If seven billion (and yet fucking counting) people cannot pitch in together to give a little bit of hope- just enough for a person to carry on with fighting their battles, for a person to keep going- then we have absolutely no right to call ourselves a society! We are as selfish and beastly as the other animals who live and die for their own selves- or, at max, for their own cubs and ilk!